Enjoying Life

1000 Gifts: 111-117

111. Celebrating our 4 year-old's birthday yesterday

112. Said 4 year-old asking if she could stay home today to "cuddle me"

113. More snow coming this afternoon

114. The smell of play-dough

115. Maple brown sugar creamer

116. Helping out an acquaintance in need yesterday

117. Watching a tea party with fancy shoes, fancy purses, and pearls with Daddy on Skype
And, her prayer:
"How we do what you say, what you say, what you say...
God is watching over you, you, you...
Because I love you, Jesus"

1000 Gifts: 101-110

101. Putting the youngest two to bed at 6:30pm last night and having them fall asleep immediately

102. Our youngest waking up by herself this morning and not crying at all

103. Taking time to clean while she is at preschool today

104. Counting on one hand how many garbage days are left before my husband gets home

105. Anticipating a busy and fun weekend ahead

106. Finding out by myself where the coolant leak in our van is

107. The kids eating their meal last night and asking me for seconds

108. Looking forward to going to the gym sans kids when he gets home

109. Christmas vacation up north

110. An awesome devotional this week about submission

1000 Gifts: 92-100

92. A wonderful Thanksgiving weekend 

93. A beautiful blanket of snow
94. Attending "Nutcracker Delights" and the kids wanting it to be a tradition every year
95. The smell of Christmas when I crack open totes filled with decorations
96. Our Jesse Tree tradition
97. Numerous nativity scenes around the house
98. New Christmas music: Jeremy Erickson and WOW Christmas
99. Nurturing friendships
100. The reason for the season

This devotional was in my inbox this morning.  After last night, this was exactly what God knew I needed to read.

Completely Full, Yet Totally Empty

Samantha Reed

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.” John 1:1, 14 (ESV)

How are you? I’m posed this question many times a day, but haven’t delved into the truth lately. ‘Cause truth is, there are only a few I want to be that honest with. And those I generally share the depths with are wading through extenuating circumstances. Filled to capacity, they’ve needed a place to pour out.

Cupped hands catch their words, worries, wants. Until my hands are heavy.

I’m weary from taking in and not pouring myself out in return. I understand; they don’t have it to give right now. Yet, hour upon hour of listening… I’m not sure I have it to give right now either.

Irony is, my very name means “Listener.” Double irony is my life verse from last year: “Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed” (Proverbs 11:25b NIV). But I can not take any more words into a soul cram-full. And I can not pour out refreshment that is not there.

I’m completely full, yet totally empty.

And so I selfishly check out in the name of self-preservation; retreat into myself, away from their words weighted with pain and trouble and questions. Distance my being from all words. Until the Word beckons me with cupped hands large enough to hold my needy soul, friend’s worn circumstances, the thin world.

I pour into the Word, a measureless crevice in which my words rest. He asks three words my parched soul thirsts for, “How are you?”

I’m weary. "I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10b (NIV)

I feel alone. “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:20b (NIV)

I can’t take much more. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28b (NIV)

I pour out, He pours in. An ebb and flow more natural than the ocean’s tides. My needy soul needs His words; needs Him: the Word.

Community is God-given. But friend’s and family’s ability to be leaned on will ebb and flow. Hence our soul’s deepest need: friendship with the Lord. {Inhale deeply that delight: we’re friends with God.} Friends with the unchanging nature of theWord, Jesus.

Will you take His cupped hand, reaching out to hold you, your cares, your friends and family members? Take His hand and take a walk through Him, the Word. Pour your truthful answers into Him and pour yourself into the fields of Scripture. Refreshment awaits. He’s asking, “How are you?”

Dear Lord, thank You for never changing. Thank You for listening and hearing. Thank You for Your faithful friendship. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

I got on my knees tonight, completely broken.

I did this after leaving church, driving past our exit, driving and driving some more.

And crying.

I drove until all three kids fell asleep and after I used up all the Kleenex's in the box.

I poured out my soul on our little office floor, 

leaning against the cushy chair that has followed us around during the past 11 1/2 years of military life.

He knows that I'm angry about some things.

He knows I'm sad.

He knows I'm tired.

He knows I'm stretched to the max.

He knows that I'm tired of sleeping alone.

He knows that I miss my best friend and his hugs.

He also knows that my heart yearns for something more.

To make a difference, to serve, to be a part of something bigger than myself.

1000 Gifts: 87-91

87. Our church's messaging system.  Without a call yesterday, we probably would have shown up an hour early this morning.

88. The kids waking up an hour early, on their own.

89. Getting ready without rushing, drinking two cups of coffee, blogging, and doing devotions before church.

90. My husband smiling and laughing on Skype last night.  One of the biggest things I miss about him being gone (besides sleeping alone) is laughing and joking around with him, so this was so nice.

91. A beautiful sunrise

1000 Gifts: 79-86

79. A warm house

80. Warm clothes

81. A warm vehicle

82. Hot food

83. Hot coffee

84. The luxury of taking a long, hot bubble bath two nights in a row.

85. God providing my husband his job, so we can have these things.

86. My hard-working husband who wants to give us the world.

Quiet Time

Why He's My Better Half

Things I've googled since my husband has left:

Wrestling moves

How to make a cool paper airplane

How to string a guitar

Nighttime prayers for boys

Lego creations

Harry Potter costume

How to play a DVD on a PS3

Fantasy Football tips